Friday, November 18, 2005

You Might Be Dressing on Broadway If:

  1. You consider personally doing your own laundry a complete waste of time.
  2. People in your union wear tinfoil hats to keep aliens from reading their brain(?) waves.
  3. You accept having one day off a week as the norm.
  4. You become frustrated when people don't grasp the concept of upstage/downstage.
  5. You understand the subtle nuances between dry cleaning fluid and vodka (Dry cleaning fluid comes in plastic bottles, while vodka is packaged in glass).
  6. You have quads of death from running 5 flights of stairs multiple times a day.
  7. Your chiropractor sends you a Christmas card asking for tickets in exchange for services.
  8. You can spot an untied shoe, unzipped trousers, or missing buttons, up to 100 ft away.
  9. Your union just recently completely screwed you on healthcare.
  10. You can execute a quickchange in the dark and not drop a stitch on your current knitting project (or lose your place in the novel you are reading).
  11. You can do 3 things simultaneously and never engage anything more than muscle memory.
  12. You are on a first name basis with local deli owners, who make your coffee "your way" whenever you walk in the front door, reguardless of who is in line ahead of you.
  13. You attempt to limit your binges to Sunday evening.
  14. The Container Store excites you immensely.
  15. You not only know the definition and use of a bitelight, but three different locations they can be purchased.
  16. You become violent when you catch someone cutting paper with your brand new Ginghers.
  17. You know what a Rub-A-Dub is, and what it's used for.
  18. You understand first hand the differences between "Cast," "Crew," and "Company."
  19. The only personal item in your work apron is a Percocet, 'for emergency purposes only.'

And the biggest sign You Might Be Dressing on Broadway....

20. You've seen so much tit and ass that you are no longer even remotely interested.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My name is Laura Clos and i would like to show you my personal experience with Percocet.

I am 43 years old. Have been on Percocet for 1 week now. It does kill the pain, but I found that I get itchy with this drug like I do w/ morphine.

I have experienced some of these side effects-
Itchiness and bizarre dreams about zombies.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Laura Clos

November 29, 2008 1:32 PM  

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